• Stephanie Dorfman, MS, RD

We are More than Just a Body - Let's get Creative with our Compliments to Each Other

Tired of weight focused compliments? I am too! Check out the list of different compliments below that we can spread to friends and family that will lift each other up and aren’t all about our bodies. We are more than just a body!

“You’ve lost so much weight! You look aaaamazing!”

“Wow, when did you become so skinny!”

“That diet that you have been doing makes you look so much better!”

Do these comments sound familiar? Or maybe.. Make you a bit uncomfortable?

These comments are genuine and heartfelt from the complimenter’s point of view, but it can cause the receiver to feel awkward or believe that their self worth is based on their weight and appearance.

Are we only friends with people based on their outside appearances? Definitely not!

If we solely focused on those qualities, we would end up unhappy in all of our relationships since traits like kindness, respect, and loyalty are neglected.

WE ARE MORE THAN JUST A BODY! We are more than just our appearance. We are more than just what we eat and how often we exercise. Our body/size/what we eat is the LEAST interesting about us.

So why do we use these kinds of compliments?

Diet culture has ingrained in our minds that being skinny, thin, smaller, fit (all of the words...) is essential for human life. And because of diet culture, we strive to achieve that impossible societal perfection everyday - but for what? Since we want to look a certain way, we think praising other people’s weight is a nice thing to say...In reality, these types of comments can be damaging to one’s self esteem. It could make someone believe that they weren’t worthy enough before they were called out for their weight or physical change. The next time you meet up with a friend, family member, colleague, etc consider the following before making a comment about their appearance:

  • Do you know why their appearance has changed?

  • Are they currently struggling with an eating disorder, disordered eating, or body image?

  • Are you currently struggling with an eating disorder, disordered eating, or body image?

  • Have you considered your own/society’s fatphobia and weight bias?

  • Is someone’s weight or physical appearance the only thing to comment on? (or is it just the first thing we see?)

Let’s get rid of this type of thinking and start praising people for other qualities they have!

Here are some non-weight based compliments we can use instead!

  1. I am so proud of you!

  2. You always put a smile on my face

  3. I love your style of clothing! You are so good at putting outfits together!

  4. You mean the world to me.

  5. Your work ethic encourages me to work harder at my job!

  6. You are an incredible friend. I am so lucky to have you!

  7. You’re so creative!

  8. You are a helpful friend/parent/child

  9. I always look forward to spending time with you.

  10. Your kindness makes me believe there is hope in the world

Here are just 10 examples (more here on the amazing blog by Rachel Hartley, RD, LD) of heartfelt comments you can use for your loved ones. It will make them feel a lot better, and it will also make you feel great to put a smile on someone's face!

Let’s bring in more positive compliments into 2021!

What are other non-weight based compliments? Share below!!

Want to talk about these topics further? Do you have more questions? Schedule a free discovery call so we can chat all about it!

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